- It’s free.
- You can do it anywhere.
- It’s pretty fun.
- You don’t need to look presentable. You can pretend you are wearing lingerie touching yourself – when in fact you are watching the Food Network on the couch.
- It makes you feel good.
- You can release your inner sex demon. Donkey Punch? Angry Dragon? Dog in Bathtub? Oh, the possibilities..
- Living life on the edge is fun.
- You may adopt a stalker.
- You may forget but the phone never will.
- Following through on your promise of performing the “Dog in Bathtub.”
- Teasing only lasts for so long.
- Blue balls.
- Rarely meets expectations when it actually happens.
- It will get out. Some how, some way.
- At the end of the day, you are just touching yourself.